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Sung to "Winter Wonderland" Shootin' ducks Ain't it pleasant Tearing wings Off a pheasant We're tying a noose To string up a moose Slaughtering our winter wonderland In the meadow we will kill a bunny Shoot a squirrel and hack apart a cat Set some traps for unsuspecting racoons So we can have a furry winter hat Later on We'll conspire T' start a large Forrest fire The dynamite's gone But we'll get along Slaughtering our winter wonderland |
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Hexnuts roasting on an open fire Jack Frost sucking on your nose Yuletide carolers being flung in the fire Ouch you're standing on my toes Everybody knows some bourbon or some chardonnay Helps to make the season tight Tiny tots with their Dad's all a glow Will find that Mom is pissed tonight They say that Santa's on his way He's bringing everything that Dad bought the other day And every Mother's child, is gonna try To see if Santa really bought that big lie And so I'm offering this simple phrase To everybody except you And though it's been said, many times, many ways!!! |
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There's Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Cupid Donner and Blitzen and Vixen and Stupid But do you recall A famous reindeer and all Rudolph a Red Nosed Reindeer Had a very shiny nose They never let poor Rudolph Join in any reindeer games Then one soggy Christmas Eve Santa came t' say Rudolph with your nose so bright Don't deride my sleight tonight Then how the reindeers loved him (and Comet) And they shouted out with ga-leee Rudolph a Red Nosed Reindeer You'll go down in history (and Comet, remember Comet!!!!!) |